Finding Your Voice Amidst the Noise

Finding YOUR Voice Amidst the Noise

Hey Queens! This week I am going to teach you how to find YOUR voice amidst all the noise, which can be incredibly difficult these days.

What does “your voice” mean?

Your voice is how you communicate who you are and what your place in the world is. It is a never-ending adventure. It includes the words you use, your tone, and how you present yourself to the outside world. You have the power to shape your own image by embracing the voice that is completely yours.

Why is it hard to find your voice?

There are sooo many reasons it can be hard to find your voice. First, womxn are judged more, and more harshly, than men for their opinions. It isn’t fair, but that is the way our society is. Men are expected to speak up and womxn are expected to be pretty. As more womxn speak up and get into positions of power I believe this will change, and you can be part of this change by speaking your truth and making it less intimidating for other womxn to do so. Other times we may have never taken the time to define ourselves separately from other people in our lives. In that case our voice may just not be our own and we need to take the time to find it.

How do you find YOUR voice? Here are some rules to follow:

Rule 1: Stop trying to please everyone. Speak your truth and you will attract your people. One of the most annoying things to me is people collecting “friends” on social that they do not resonate with because they think business is a numbers game. While numbers do play a role, it doesn’t help to have people in your space who make you feel scared to share the real you. I do not censor myself. Which I am sure anyone that follows me already knows. Does everyone like me? No. Do people get offended and unfriend me? ALL. THE. TIME. Do I care? No. I give zero fucks.

Rule 2: Use YOUR own words to communicate. Don’t just copy the language of others. You do not have to use the same words leaders in your industry use. You do not have to use words that your friends and family use. If you want to speak like you’re in the 18th century do it. Speak how you want to! Use language that feels good for you. Understand that word choice is in fact important.

Rule 3: Do not be a robot. No one wants to talk to a Stepford wife. Instead share real stories from your life. Tell how you struggled and overcame the struggle. This doesn’t mean you have to share all of the messy things. But you can share that not every day is perfect, and you fed your kid ice cream for breakfast today because you were tired, or you didn’t feel like teaching science, so you made your 6th graders watch the Magic School Bus. (These things really happen in my life btw). Share things that make you real, the things that make you, you.

Rule 4: Find topics you are passionate about. If you are scared to speak up always begin by speaking about things you are wildly passionate about. How do you know what are you passionate about? Think about what makes make you super happy, angry, sad, etc. The things you have the strong feelings about are your passions. Starting here will make it easier for you to speak up. For example, when I first meet people, I may not really want to talk to them (shocking, I know) but if something comes up around fitness or mindset, I get so excited I cannot stop talking. Find out what makes you feel this way.

Let’s take a quick second to listen to today’s amazing sponsor:

Rule 5:  Try on different styles, experiment boldly. Your voice isn’t just about your words. It is everything that expresses to the world who you are & this includes your physical appearance – like your fashion, makeup, hair, etc. The only way to know what you really like and what screams YOU is to experiment. You never know a hot pink faux fur coat may be just what you need to feel like a bad ass.

Rule 6: Write. A LOT. Seriously, if you don’t have a journal by now, I am going to feel as if you are not listening to me. If this is your first time tuning in, you will quickly learn I believe writing will solve most of our problems. There is something magical about putting your thoughts on paper. The key is to let your thoughts out on the paper without editing them. If you have a hard time knowing where to start use journal prompts and a timer and let your thoughts flow. Eventually, you will get so used to writing that you will feel weird when you’re not doing it. When you write things, no one will ever read you will use the words that are truly yours, you will be honest about your thoughts, and you will begin to develop your voice without any fear.

Rule 7: Learn to listen to yourself. The truth comes from feeling, not from thinking, not from doing, from feeling. Learn to be aware of the way different situations and conversations impact you. Pay attention to things that lower your vibe and the things that raise it. We feel all these things for a reason. Meditation is a great way to learn to control your breath and tune into your thoughts and feelings. Ask yourself: Where am I holding back? When am I biting my tongue? Where can I speak up more? If I knew I couldn’t fail what would I do? If a lot comes up for you go back to your journal and write it out. If you notice certain feelings popping up during different situations write it down!

Rule 8: Cut out the noise. Limit consumption of other people’s opinions. If there is always someone else’s voice in your head how will you find your own? You won’t. Take time for solitude. You need peace, so you can learn to hear YOUR voice. When you don’t take time to process information you have learned then all you do is regurgitate other people’s thoughts and ideas. The world needs more original voices, not more of the same information being stated over and over. The world needs YOUR voice, not Suzie’s voice coming from your mouth. Trust me we can all tell when you’re sharing thoughts that are not your own. You might be able to slide with this for a little while but at some point, people will realize you are not being authentic.

Sometimes this means you must take a break from consuming personal development materials, or you need to shake up who you are consuming the information from. Switching up whose books you read or whose podcasts you listen to can be a great way to ensure that you are not stuck in an echo chamber.

Finally, if you are working with mentors, consultants, and/or coaches I want you to know that you don’t have to adopt all of their viewpoints or act and speak like them. In all situations follow your intuition and do what feels in alignment with who you are. Everyone is different and that makes the world a magical place. Believe that you have a unique voice that the world needs to hear because you do.

Love & Abundance,

Falon aka Queen of Captivation